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twirlpenguin
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Name: Emily
Birthday: 3/28/1987
Gender: Female
Interests: Umm, prebsyterian-ness, my TAMS-ters, architecture, Sci-Fi/Fantasy, the country, Drury
My Top 5 Artists of the Week:
Expertise: Haha.. making other people laugh without meaning to, it's my purpose
and being everybody's Mommy.. and little sister.. and grandma..
genetically it's all very complicated ; )
Occupation: Student
Message: message meEmail: email me
Website: visit my website
Member Since:
5/18/2004
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| Hello friends! This is just a quick note to say that, well, I have moved!
In order to keep in touch with my work friends, I made a brand-new blog (which makes for four I have had) and am trying to keep it updated. That being said, there are posts there! Go check it out! More exclamation marks!
Here it be: http://manckeinreallife.wordpress.com/
-Emily
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| Well, friends, my amazing luck with electronics has continued! I can't
remember if I posted here that my lappy's hinges were completely
freaking broken, well one of them was. The hinge had completely sheared
off. Cool, huh? 
Well,
with help from the ever-awesome Ian and Matthew with a Beard, I have
successfully completely removed my laptop top, aka the screen, and have
instead connected a flat-screen monitor we had back home.
 Lovely, right? 
Mom
and I have decided to go ahead and order a MacBook when the semester is
over to replace poor headless Linus. The upside of all of this, besides
the whole new Mac in May business, is that now I have a fully
functional desktop for my house when I am a grown-up some day. Ha!
Also, I am going to try to expand my hacker skillz and turn the old
screen into a digital picture frame : D 
In
other, non-computer news, Jim and I celebrated our 2-year anniversary
Thursday and my 21st birthday was Friday! I got a ton of facebook
messages and such, but most of them told me to be responsible, which is
funny since I didn't, and am not going to, drink. Jim and I did go see
Horton Hears a Who and had Cold Stone, but that was the extent of my
debauchery. We are having a triple birthday party tonight for me and my
friends Brian and Chelsea, but I plan on simply marveling at the
drunkenness of others, namely my amusing theatre friends : D  
All
in all, life is going pretty well. I'm sporting all A's, one A- and a
B+ as of mid-term, which isn't bad, and have figured out my schedule
for next semester. James and I are doing very well, but are super busy
the majority of the time. I'm going back to my job in San Antonio this
summer and living with my sister, brother-in-law, and my awesome twin
nephews in their new house (yay!). I think that's about it for now,
though!
Also, props to me for posting. And then un-props for saying props. | | |
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Accomplishment: I made a 90 on my first Accounting test!!! : D
Anger: A party that is to be at my house tonight has thus far resulted in two things:
1. an overflowed toilet draining trough my bathroom ceiling and dripping all over my stuff
2. a roommate yelling at me and threatening to smash things
because we asked her to do the dishes. I guarantee they are not my
dirty dishes because I don't cook here anymore because its always a
fucking mess and someone stole/misplaced my spaghetti pot. Seriously, I
never cook here.
Anger, cont...: Did I mention that said party
was never revealed to the other 3 of us who live here. Isn't it usually
courtesy to ask before one hosts a party in a group house?
Comfort:
Jim and I are in a happy, happy place of comfort and laughs and he's
the best boyfriend ever. Seriously. He bought me 300 for Valentine's
Day. It's hard to get more awesome than that.
Confusion: Brian and I are having a weird time. I'm not sure what to do.
Dismay: We had a weird sleet-storm-y thing that made it look like Springfield had been attacked by snowcones. It was surreal
Excitement:
I wiggled the iPod hard drive cables and fixed my iPod when I'd thought
the hard drive had gone bad. Also, I found a cool program to display
the cover art on my desktop from iTunes all pretty-ily.
Excitement,
cont...: BJ and I have been getting along fantastically! And his
girlfriend, Katie, and I are quickly becoming BFFs. In a
your-boyfriend-and-mine-are-BFFs sort of way.
A P.s. Come in here and yell again. I am just looking for a reason to tell your little ass off. Do it.
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| I
need to accept that I’ve done all I can do, that I can’t change
anyone’s mind but my own if it doesn’t want to be changed. No matter my
reasons, my explanations, their answer will always be that I need to
change. Even though the reasons I give are the same ones that they hold
close and believe in, mine will not be acceptable. The only way for
them to accept the way I am and why I am that way is for them to change
their minds, not for me to change. The
happiness I have is the one I need to concentrate on, to nurture and
enjoy and revel in. I don’t need to worry about how to appease people
that aren’t really there for me anyway. There
is no logic involved in what is going on. There is no way for me to
flip a magic switch and have everything be OK. I need to find the
happiness within myself, not to try to change what I am to make them
happy. I cannot explain myself to them with any hope of understanding. I cannot react differently to get a more hopeful response. I am not going to try to be who and how they want me to be. That’s not me, even if they don’t understand that.
They
know who I am to them. I know who they are to me. Both of these may
need to change, but they probably won’t. We just have to try to make
the little adjustments, the ones that will make the tears and battles
farther apart.
The important part is to be happy with who I am, how I am, where I am, and who I am with. That is what is important. It is.
-----------------------------------------------
I
am sick. I am tired. I am tired of this. I am tired of you. I am tired
of you taking advantage of me. I am tired of you telling me I’m
overreacting and I’m tired of never being or doing right to you. I am
tired of you overreacting and no one calling you on it. I am tired of
your pretentiousness. I am tired of you skewing other people’s
perceptions and opinions. I am tired of you making problems where there
is happiness and understanding. I am tired of you having some sort of
power over me and my feelings. I am tired of trying to stand up for
myself and being told that I am wrong. I am tired of being dismissed. I
am sick and I am tired. I am sick and tired of you.
You arrogant, pretentious, self-centered, overly dramatic, little son of a bitch. ---------------------------------------------- In
other news, Jim and I are fine. A year and a half is rapidly
approaching and the semester is already flying by. We just got two
kittens, Parker and PB. They're wonderful and cute and ours!
It's
infuriating to be so happy with my life, but still want to give up so
much of the time for something I can't change or affect anymore. Jim's
done what he can, too. It's getting to the point that I'm about to say
fuck social whatever and yell and scream until something changes. I am
tired of being the wrong one, the one that overreacts, the one that
needs to change. How can you make someone change their mind if they're permanently convinced that they're right? The answer? You can't.
Unfortunately I can't be OK with that. | | |
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I just passed my driver's test, friends! That's right.. I finally have a driver's license. Be proud of me. Very proud. ; )
Also,
Jim is in London right now and I haven't gotten to talk to him yet
since we're having phone card issues as well as time problems.
Hopefully he'll find me today.. | | |
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